Hello, dear readers—or should I say archaeologists? Because digging up this blog after 14 years must feel like unearthing a forgotten civilization. Welcome back to my chronicles of navigating life with the attention span of a goldfish at a Las Vegas magic show.
If you’re wondering what brought me back, well, so am I. It turns out, I forgot I even had this blog! It’s like finding money in the pocket of your old jeans, except it's words, and there's no monetary value. And while my blog was collecting digital dust, I was out there collecting... uh, actually, I can't remember what I was collecting. It was probably not more attention span.
So, let’s talk about how to combat attention deficit, or rather, how to not combat it, but maybe just gently nudge it in the right direction when it’s not looking.
1. Lists Are Your Friends (Unless You Forget Where You Put Them)
Make lists! Yes, lists are great. I make lists all the time. I find them everywhere—on napkins, on the back of receipts, in the notes app on my phone from three phones ago. Sometimes, I even find lists in the freezer. Don’t ask. The point is, lists help you remember things. What things? I’m glad you asked because I forgot why I started making this list.
2. Timers: Because Time Is a Construct (That I Regularly Misinterpret)
Timers are fantastic because they remind you that time is passing, and maybe you should have started dinner before 10 PM. Set timers for everything—starting tasks, stopping tasks, remembering to check what that burning smell is. Without timers, I’d probably still be waiting for the "right moment" to write this post. Look at us now, using time like we know what we’re doing!
3. Embrace the Chaos (It’s Going to Embrace You Anyway)
Life with a wandering attention span is never dull. Embrace the chaos. If you can’t find your keys, it’s an opportunity for an impromptu scavenger hunt. If you forget what you walked into a room for, congratulations, you just walked into a surprise party where the surprise is you might never figure out why you’re there.
4. Rewards! (I Forgot to Pick Up Mine)
Set up a reward system. It’s like training a pet but the pet is you. Finished a task? Have a cookie! Didn’t finish a task? No cookie, but you still get points for remembering there was a task. Keep the bar achievable. My personal favorite reward is giving myself a pat on the back, which turns into a solo game of Twister because I get distracted midway through.
And here we are, at the end of our little catch-up session. I’d love to promise I’ll post more regularly, but we both know that my next post could be anywhere between tomorrow and the next leap year. Stay tuned, or don’t, or just forget you were tuned in the first place—no pressure.
Remember, managing attention deficit isn’t about perfection; it's about making the most of the ups, downs, and random left turns. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go find my car keys. I last saw them when I was writing the intro to this post.
